When Anxiety Causes a Chronic Illness Flare

When anxiety causes a chronic illness flare, it can be easy for us to feel like it was our fault and to start our thoughts spiralling. This happened to me yesterday and while I rested in bed I started to get really down, today I thought we would chat about it.

Yesterday was a difficult day

So, as with many people in the UK, there had been no NHS dentists available in our town so since our dentist retired, we had not been for about five years. Recently the local dentist in town opened their NHS list for two weeks and we signed up, yesterday was our first appointment.

I must be honest, I was scared, I had a lot of treatments as a child including teeth extracted under general anaesthetic at the dentist. These experiences have left me traumatised and afraid of going to the dentist, so I was really struggling with my thoughts all morning.

I do practice mindfulness all the time, which means I try to focus on the present moment and not letting my thoughts take over. However, if my anxiety is heightened, I do struggle more to maintain mindfulness and not to get lost in my thoughts and feelings.

What didn’t help was that the reception for the dentist was really busy, and the dentist was behind for about half an hour, so the waiting was really getting to me. On top of that, people I didn’t know, who were also waiting, kept talking to us and talking to strangers is one of my anxiety triggers.

By the time we went inside, I was thankful they let me, and my husband go in together as we were booked in back-to-back. There wasn’t a lot of room for my walker, but we managed, and the nurse and dentist were really kind and made us feel better.

I was second, which I was also glad of as it meant I could see how the dentist was, and he was so kind. The actual time in the seat for me was not too bad, the dentist talked more than he had his hands and instruments in my mouth (phew).

I was worrying about if I would need any work done, but he surprised me and said that he wanted to refer me to the hospital. He found that my jaw was deviating to the right and thinks I will need some help with that like possibly Botox into my jaw.

If that is an option, I am hoping that it might stop me grinding my teeth every night as I sleep or at least ease it. I also find that I have a constant headache that isn’t too bad but is always there in the background. So, thought I am afraid of dentists, the idea of having some help with these problems sounds lovely.

At the moment, I am doing TMJ exercises as the dentist suggested, and I am hopeful that after treatments my head will feel better overall. Pressure headaches, unstable jaw and teeth grinding are quite good at working to making miserable symptoms.

However, by the time we got home I could feel I was beginning to feel tired and overwhelmed longing to go to bed so I could be alone. My husband helped me to get comfortable in bed and I watched Call the Midwife to rest and with the lights out I started to relax.

After a short nap though, I realised my left leg felt like the bones were vibrating and was really painful just like when I first got sick. Even after relaxing and resting, today I feel really tired, and I am glad I am able to rest more just writing this blog in my PJs.

But both last night and today, I find I am tearful and feeling guilt and a bit silly for getting so upset and anxious over the appointment. I think the fact that the dentist was so nice made me feel as if getting so wound up was silly; so lets talk about how we stop those spiralling thoughts.

Pressure headaches, unstable jaw and teeth grinding are quite good at working to making miserable symptoms. Share on X

Coping with a Chronic Illness Flare

When anxiety causes a chronic illness flare, it can be so easy to fall into a pattern of blaming yourself or someone close if they have caused the stress. Let’s get into how to change that:

• Thoughts aren’t always right – I practice mindfulness, because I realised that my thoughts can lie to us. Other people may have caused us stress, but it is rarely something that people mean to do. Most people are simply trying to live life as best they can and do make mistakes so try to see things from other’s perspectives.
• Our past can define us – My trauma around dentists happened to me when I was less than ten years old. This is a time when our brains are developing and can have a huge effect on us as we grow. Be kind to yourself and remember that we cannot always leave the past behind us sometimes it really affects us even decades later.
• Breathe – Concentrating on our breath and grounding yourself with the things you can feel and see and hear are wonderful ways to come back to the moment. I spent a lot of time yesterday doing just that and it really helped to remind me of the first point up there.
• Rest – Flares can come out of nowhere sometimes, but if you feel one coming it is important to rest. Don’t try to push through or let anyone talk you into staying up, go to bed put your feet up and rest for as long as you need. Guilt can often make us get up before we are ready, but that will only make the flare worse and last longer.
• Speak up – I always find if I explain to the person, I am with how I am feeling whether it is in the moment of the anxiety, or later when I am spiralling. Talking allows others to help you and also helps you to let go of worries and problems. Sharing our problems can be so difficult but whether it is to a charity like the Samaritans or a friend or family member it really makes a difference.

I really hope this article helps you when anxiety causes a chronic illness flare, it takes work and dedication to support our mental health. However, it is by sharing the things that work for us that we can help one another. So, if I missed anything or if you have anything that could help others please drop it in the comments.

Thank you xx

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